the other day i picked up my brand new BMW M3 from Bristol, it was amazing.... i couldnt wait to get it on the motorway and give it a good blast down the motorway back to Plymouth. after nailing it for half hour i realised i was dieing for a piss (must have bin the excitement) i just couldnt hold it in long enough to get to the nearest service station. i pulled into the hard shoulder, turned the ignition off and threw the key onto the passenger seat, jumped out and ran for the nearest bush. 'pssssss ahhhh ohhhh that feels good' after all the relief i went back to the car, went to open the door, oh shit its locked :O ''no way it must have locked when i threw the key''
so i called out the RAC, 30minutes later they turn up ''sorry mate your car has a new security system there is no way in unless we smash a window''
''for f*ck sake i just bought it today''
bacon turn up 5 minutes later as i am deciding what to do, ''you're going to have to break in or get it towed, we need you to clear the hard shoulder''
at this point it wasnt looking great, i had no choice other than to smash a window of my new m3 grrr
when all of a sudden, an army truck pulls up and out jumps a guy dressed in full camo with his military boots and hat.
''what seems to be the problem here? i am a mechanic in the army and could be of assistance''
''i looked my keys in the car, im such an idiot, we have to clear the hard shoulder and i have no choice other than to smash a window''
''oh right i see'' the army man walks over the the car door ''ahh i have seen this before, its got that new security system hasnt it''
''yes''
''give me a minute''
the army guy starts rubbing his leg up against the car door, im thinking wtf is this guy a freak?
i was about to say ''WTF you doing dont scratch the paint!!''
then all of a sudden up popped the locks! :O
''we're in'' says the army guy
''what did you do?''
''nothing it was my kharky trousers''
baadooom tssst kharky (car-key) lol shit joke i know!
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